Wedding. Period.

I stumbled across this picture, which were part of an article on Daily Life (where you can also find the link to see the whole pictorial gallery).

Photo: Emma Arvida Bystrom, via Vice.com

Confronting was my first thought, a bit gross, a bit icky – but why?

In our uber-obsession for cleanliness lifestyles, I have never seen any other girl having her period.

The closest was when I began to shower in an ablution block in a backpackers just outside Rome.  It wasn’t until I was drying off did I notice the engorged bloodiness of a used tampon in the door jamb.  Shudder and dry retch.

Lesson learnt: this is why you should wear your Havianas into the shower in any kind of ablution block. It’s not just the tinea you should be worried about.

It’s a shock as we don’t see it, and if we do, it’s usually in a ‘dirty’ context.

A public bathroom floor.  Or a heated argument with a plumber about a blocked loo, that no, not all girls flush their Libra Fleurs.

But back to the photos. I think he missed one scenario.

A bride having her period.

I posed a question to my Facebook girlfriends about whether it would ruin their wedding if they found out Aunty Flo would be RSVPing as ‘attending’.

Not many responded.  Six, actually. Including myself. Just to be transparent.

So either people don’t want to talk about it, or don’t actually care.

One respondent said that while it wouldn’t be convenient, it wouldn’t ‘ruin’ the wedding.

A fellow blogger recently wrote on this, sparked after spending ‘a shameful part of my afternoon reading threads on weddingbee.com’ – totes to that.

I was taken in by this topic so I went to check out what other wedding forums were saying.

I’m surprised that not many wedding threads talk about this.  It’s hard to accept that it’s not that much of a big deal, especially when some brides say quite explicitly that it’s their ‘worst fear’.

I couldn’t find one mention of this on websites like theknot.com – but that doesn’t really surprise me.

Are we worried that riding a wedding day crimson wave would ‘ruin’ it? Like my friend said, probably not. But geez it would piss you off, and not just because of the bloody truth.

I can’t judge the bride to be who said having a wedding day period would be her ‘worst fear’ – it plays on our psyche. It challenges our idea of ‘perfection’.  And, as Cosmo Bride keeps telling me, a wedding day needs to be such.

But lets forget the blood.

No one wants to feel bloated with a sore tummy, vacillating between teary, angry, depressed and ticked-off with a breakout of blemishes.

The blood is the least of our problems. Well. Not when there is a white dress at stake.

Also, you think that going to the loo at the Big Day Out was difficult?

Try manoeuvring a massive, heavy dress to readjust your Kotex while you’re already feeling like a serial killer.

Then, later, in the boudoir, the only hot action you feel like is hugging a hot water bottle.

Then there are the grooms. They have their own irks about this too. If you do decide to have a sexy party on the wedding night (FYI – or more like TMI – that’s what The Mister and I call sex), your guy might not be into it. But, never fear, I have been out with a guy who had absolutely no problems with it at all.

So.

I am exercising my right to skip those sugar pills, or take a shot of depo provera or get another Implanon stuck in my arm – but it’s not really about the blood, it’s about knowing if I don’t do it, heads will roll.

And if you don’t get bad symptoms, or don’t give two hoots, at least you will have an almost zero chance of pregnancy if you have a wedding night sexy party.

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