Exactly what is our problem with RSVPing?
How is it that it’s never been easier to contact someone, yet we still struggle with the stragglers to let us know if we’re going to expect them or not?
History lesson: The term RSVP comes from the French phrase repondez s’il vous plait or please respond.
So why don’t we?
Alright, it’s not all of us. But we know who you are.
And my confession? Since having a wedding, I am now a committed RSVPer.
Not that I wasn’t committed before, hang on, no, let’s just say that I lacked that sense of urgency. Now? I know the First World anguish it can cause. Mainly as there is actual money involved. Brides aren’t trying to be a pain or play possum with you, they need an accurate head-count. The sooner the better. It’s just written on pretty paper.
Again, why are we so lax about it?
Perhaps the wedding is a couple of months away. Heaps of time. Right? Well, not quite.
Your place at this wedding has been carefully thought about. Where you sit, what you eat, all that stuff. And this stuff needs signing off. The wedding might be eight weeks away, but the caterer needs the numbers in four weeks’ time, for example.
What used to happen with me, is that I’d get an invitation, read the whole thing twice, jot down the date in my phone and diary, stick it on the fridge and forget about it.
Yep, I would even remark on how lovely the RSVP card and self-addressed envelope are. And forget about it.
Then you get this passive-agressive email, text or phone call from a sister or mother or bridesmaid of the bride saying something like it’s a shame you won’t be there – hey, hang on! Yes I am! I haven’t said that I’m not coming!
BAM, ladies and gents. You didn’t RSVP. Tsk! Tsk!
And there are those that follow the golden rule of replying immediately. The BBF was the first RSVP we got back. You could tell he got the invite, checked the dates, pulled out the little RSVP note and envelope and popped it into the post that same day. And that is why he is the best. In fact, we’re still waiting on a couple of RSVPs, and our wedding was in November.
I read an article recently about a woman named Shederyl.
As any normal bride, she was started to get concerned. As it turned out, some people that RSVP’d saying they were coming, didn’t.
One or two you could maybe forgive at the last minute, but in Shederyl’s case, it was 15.
During the reception, she called her aunt over and told her to get the addresses of the 15 no-shows. She figured $35 ought to just about cover her expenses for the dinners and drinks she paid for that they didn’t use.
Yep. She was going to invoice them.
She even planned to trick these missing guests. “They’re gonna think they’re getting another invitation. BAM! Bill,” she said.
So, the lesson here is to create a ‘do it now’ attitude when you get an invite to a wedding.
Don’t be rude and treat it like an overdue City of Subiaco parking ticket.
Especially with people like Shederyl around.