Name – thewrybride

Age – thirties (nosey bastards)

Lives – Perth, Western Australia

Day job – Senior online producer for WAtoday.com.au

Previous jobs – Cashier at a fruit and veggie shop which is now a Dominos, worked for a fancy costume shop (purely because I could spell ‘medieval’ and have a genuine interest in Star Wars and saloon girls from the dusty wild west), worked in a wedding dress shop (HATED it), worked at a dating agency (for two weeks, story to come about that), worked FIFO, both in the WA outback and offshore, radio producer for the ABC.

Dislikes – dried fruit, ‘mini’ tornadoes, Angelina Jolie, Miranda Kerr, cleaning showers, sand, sunglasses on children, news ‘stories’ that are really just adverts, phonecalls from the bank, bloating, right-wing agenda news, the middle seat on the plane, dry heels, moving house, snakes.

Guilty pleasures – Crocs, Coffee Chill, Taylor Swift, hair lackeys, bridal magazines, Facebook stalking, sequins, 7th Heaven, heavy metal and cock rock music, Paula Deen, New York Post, The Sun, mashed potatoes, Walmart superstores, oversized drinks, pouring over family photo albums and school yearbooks, Martha Stewart.

Can’t live without – the Mister, a shower, Homeland, wifi, my BBF (best boy friend) Pete, Bonds singlets, black leggings, glasses, headphones, the Savage Love and This American Life podcast, lists, a getaway vehicle, Bill Bryson books, black eyeliner, Eric Carmen, clean sheets, moroccan hair oil, wine, my Soda Stream, 4-ply loo paper, online shopping, this video and Tina Fey.